My future awaits

Waiting . . . . waiting . . . . waiting . . . .
Being this close is maddening to say the least.
Tired eyes staring at my inbox hoping for that little "1 unread" to pop up. I sit waiting for a very very important email. A formal job offer. And quite an offer too. More money, opportunity for travel, a new start in a new field, a new start in life.
I know we are not supposed to let our work define us but I can not help feeling like I've been in limbo the last 9 months. My last nine month wait was far more life altering but also far more fun. This wait has been disappointing and at times heartbreaking. Friends and family say they understand but unless they are currently in my shoes, in this horrible economy, well lets say I very much appreciate the support.
Even with a mountain of support behind me, family and friends in my corner, I am still going into the ring alone. I have to find that  next job myself.
As much as I should feel confident that this time the job will come through I can not let myself get excited until the formal offer is approved by the company's HR department and the paper work comes through to my email account.
So I wait. Thoughts of how the second salary will make life easier for my family play through my mind.
The nearly bald tires on the car, the roof in need of repair, the washing machine that broke down last night. Just a sample of the list of things we need to take care of sooner than later not that I mind holding off on the washing machine.  Then there are the fun extras like a chance of training in London for two weeks, maybe a real vacation. Sure getting up earlier to commute downtown will be tough at first for everyone. We'll adjust.
I will miss Erin. She has blossomed these months at home. I know she will miss me too. But this job comes with weekends off which I have never had in 20 years. Having full weekends for family time will be wonderful.
So I wait. Certain this time the wait will be worth it.